Why We Repeat Patterns in Relationships – and How Therapy Can Help

Have you ever found yourself in the same kind of relationship, just with a different person? Maybe you keep choosing emotionally unavailable partners, or always end up giving more than you receive. These patterns can feel frustrating and confusing — but they’re often not random. In psychology, this is known as repetition compulsion — an unconscious attempt to recreate early relational experiences, often in the hope of finally “fixing” or resolving them.

Our minds are drawn to the familiar, even when it’s painful. The good news is that these patterns can be understood and changed. Therapy offers a safe space to explore why we’re drawn to certain dynamics, where these patterns come from, and how to start making different choices. The goal isn’t blame — it’s awareness. And from that awareness comes real change.

To learn more about my relationship counselling services in Cambridge, please get in touch